Going Outside of The Box

Have you ever gotten way out of your comfort zone?  What’s it like for you, to try something new?  How do you feel when you do something you’ve never done before?

A couple of days ago, I learned our local minor league baseball team, the Tri-City Valley Cats, were holding open auditions for people to sing The Star Spangled Banner at their home games this season.  I have been told I am a good singer, so I figured, why not?   The worst I could do was not be chosen, and perhaps be a little embarrassed in front of a few judges and a couple of other contestants.

Little did I know.  The larger of our local malls was packed with Saturday shoppers.  There were over 50 contestants, and more arriving as I finished, at number 44.  All of the others had friends and family along for moral support.  I had me.  My husband was on his way home from a visit with his family in Maryland, our kids couldn’t come, and our friends had other commitments. 

There was a cameraman from one of the local network affiliates, who filmed some of the contestants.  I breathed a sigh of relief when he left!  Unfortunately, the photographer from one of the local papers arrived right after he left, and she stayed.  My photo was chosen for one on the front page its Sunday local section, and is now in a slide show on its website. 

http://www.timesunion.com/news/slideshow/ValleyCats-anthem-tryouts-43255.php#photo-2958649

I have my eyes closed in the photo because they were closed the whole time I sang.  I was concentrating on the tempo, the music and getting the words out properly.  They had us singing it a-capella (that’s with no backup music, for the uninitiated), and it’s not an easy thing to sing, especially without backup.

In my opinion, it is, by far, the least flattering photo taken of me in my entire life!!  Thankfully, the folks at church hadn’t seen it before services Sunday.  Unfortunately, the nurse at my doctor’s office Monday morning and about 1/2 of my coworkers have.  I had it mentioned to me all Monday, and learned they will be posting a print of the website photo to the department bulletin board after our monthly staff meeting Friday.  Oh, my goodness, what a fuss!

Getting outside the box is not easy.  I was nervous, I’ll admit it.  I’ve sung in front of larger crowds.  I just always had moral support someplace, and backup music.  It was never just me and my voice. 

But I did it.  And if I did it, that means you can get out of your boxes, too.

Poor To Make Rich – Some Thoughts On Holy Week

Who is poor?  Who is rich?  What is the difference between being rich and poor?  Is it always money, or can it be something else??

In the Bible, the Apostle Paul considered this subject in 2 Corinthians 8:9 when he said,

For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though He was rich, yet for your sakes He became poor, so that you through His poverty might become rich.

Before He took on the form of a man and humbled Himself to be born as a baby in Bethlehem, Jesus was rich beyond measure!  He was and is the Father’s only begotten Son, and as such, all the treasures of Heaven are His.

As the Son of His Heavenly Father, as long as He was in Heaven, there was nothing Jesus needed.  There was nothing He lacked.  There was nothing He didn’t want that He didn’t have immediately at His fingertips.  The angels adored Him.  All creation (save for humans) recognized His greatness and worshiped Him for it.

But for our sakes, Jesus became poor.  He became needy.  He needed food.  He needed clothes.  He needed shelter from the weather.  He needed to be cared for as a child, and raised.  He needed to be taught to speak, and to learn the Holy Scriptures.

Jesus needed relationships.  He needed friends and companions to share His burden and His joys.  He needed down time, time alone with His Father.  As a fully human person, Jesus, the Holy Son of God needed everything we as regular human beings need.

And then, Jesus gave up even the little He had.  He became the ultimate Sacrifice, the final Substitute for our willful sinfulness.  Jesus needed His life, and gave it up because we needed salvation more.

How awesome is that!  We needed, and Jesus gave out of His need, for us.  We needed salvation.  We needed a restored relationship with God.  He who had it all gave it all up, and then gave up what little He did have, all because we needed it.

And now, we have the opportunity to become rich in God, even as Jesus is.  When we accept the salvation His sacrifice offers, we become joint Heirs with Him in all God the Father has for Him and those who believe.  We become redeemed.  We share in the incomparable, immeasurable riches of Jesus.  He shares them with us because His sacrifice gave them to us.

Sisters (For Judi and Suzanne)

Sisters in body and sisters in blood,

That’s what we were born to be;

But sisters in heart and sisters in love

Is what we’ve become, you and me.

*

We grew up together, often sharing a room,

And we learned together how to live.

We learned how to fight and we learned how to share,

And we learned to be unselfish and to give.

*

Then we went separate ways and lived different lives,

And we all married extraordinary men,

And in that special way sisters often have

Our hearts have come full circle again.

*

We pour out our hearts over long distance wires

Knowing the others our secrets will keep,

And we laugh together and share silly things,

And sometimes, together, we weep.

*

Though we don’t see each other as often as we’d like

Because the distance between us is long,

We know when the need is too great to deny

That our sister will be there and be strong.

*

We grew up together, my dear sisters and me,

As sisters of body and blood,

But because of the faith we know we all share,

We’re also sisters, through Christ, in our God.

*

I’m glad we’ve grown up sisters of the heart,

And I’m glad you are sisters to me,

But I’m gladder still, and even more does my heart rejoice,

To know we’ll be sisters in eternity.

Agape

I.

There is no place love cannot go,

No boundary to high to cross.

No barrier can stand in its way

When easing pain and loss.

*

There is no color love can see

When it looks into a life.

There is no heart love cannot reach,

No matter what’s causing the strife.

*

There are no lines drawn on a map

In some political tower

That will keep out, in any way,

Love’s healing strength and power.

*

There are no words which can stop love

Or cause permanent dismay,

For love will triumph, what ‘ere the cost,

And come through, what ‘ere the way.

*

The power of love is a simple thing:

No matter how high seems the cost

Of going out in all the world

And caring of the lonely and lost.

II.

I’ve rarely heard of hearts too hard

And roads that have been too far trod

Who will not yield, to the last part,

To the healing love of God.

*

The love of God is best expressed

Through Jesus on the Cross.

As the Holy One suffered for our sin

In the agony of His undeserved loss.

*

God never suffers anything

To be between He and those He loves.

If a barrier, He breaks it down.

If a wall, a wall He moves.

*

There is no difference in God’s love

And in the love He has to impart.

It rushes from His throne to our lives,

Then from us to others, heart to heart.

*

God’s love contains the power,

And yielding is the key

That breaks down every barrier

In setting other hearts free.

III.

Seek out love and find it,

And then give it away.

For it is within the giving

We receive more than we can repay.

*

Let hope be your helper

When discouragement harasses love.

For hope and love give strength we need

Every barrier we see to move.

*

Love beckons with a challenge,

Calling all to take a part,

To spread its healing power

To at least one other hurting heart.

*

Love isn’t just a way of helping,

Or a means through which we give.

Loving is meant as our center and purpose.

Love’s power, our reason to live.

All I Learned About Friendship . . .

How is friendship defined?  What qualities constitute friendship?  Why are there so many books on people skills, and so few on friendship and how to be a good friend?

The online encyclopedia, Wikipedia, has a long and involved definition, getting into the psychological and sociological aspects.  The “Anne” books by Lucy Maud Montgomery define friendship in several ways, the most telling and descriptive being “kindred spirits.”  Going back farther, the ancient Greeks used the word “philia,” from which we get Philadelphia, to describe friendships.

Orrin Woodward

In the recent book RESOLVED: 13 Resolutions for LIFE, leadership guru Orrin Woodward has an entire chapter on the subject.  In it he says,

I have identified eight essential principles for building and maintaining long-term philia-friendships.

1. True friends form around a shared insight, interest, or taste, enjoying the common bond uniting them.
2. True friends accept one another, loving each other despite our human imperfections.
3. True friends approve of one another, protecting each others’ weaknesses while enhancing each others’ strengths.
4. True friends appreciate one another, encouraging, serving, and believing in one another’s gifts and talents.
5. True friends listen with empathy, learning the hopes, dreams, fears and struggles of one another.
6. True friends celebrate one another’s success, being proud of each other’s accomplishments without a hint of envy.
7. True friends are trustworthy, maintaining all confidences shared with unimpeachable honor and self-respect, knowing that  gossip separates the best of friends.
8. True friends are loyal, respecting and defending one another’s character, reputation, and motives, as far as truth allows, while addressing any issues or concerns between them promptly and privately, ensuring misunderstandings never fester.

Like many of us, I first learned about friendship at home, surrounded by both older and younger siblings.  I learned to share, to not hit people and not to say mean things to them.  These early lessons were reinforced in my early school years.

I will admit, however, I learned as much in school from the bad examples of my peers as I did from their good ones.  Unpopular for reasons I could never (and still don’t) fathom, I learned the painful lessons of how not to treat people, quickly realizing the treatment I did not like receiving was the opposite of what I wanted and needed.  I further discerned if I wanted and needed those things, other people must also need and want them.  As I practiced these lessons on my friends, I learned to tailor what I did for each individual’s personality and style.

I learned more about friendships from the books I read.  I learned of John and Abigail Adams, how they sought to be friends first, making their relationship in marriage a true partnership.  They began and ended their letters to one another recalling this aspect of their relationship, and were often heard in public addressing one another as their dearest friend.

What have you learned about friendship?  How did you learn it?  If one of our shared goals in human relationships is to be and have good friends, what can we do to improve our abilities in this area?  I have some thoughts.  I welcome yours.

To Number My Days

Though we think it long,

Life is really brief,

Whether it be bitter or sweet.

Then after our lives,

An eternity we’ll live

And our blessed Creator we’ll meet.

*

Teach me, O God,

To number my days

As I walk before Your sight.

That from their brief span

I may learn to be wise;

Teach me to count them up right.

*

I only have a short time

To live on this world

And tell others of You and Your ways.

Teach me, O God,

Not to put Your will off,

But to obey You as long as it’s “today.”

*

Help me, O God,

As I walk along,

To live in your grace and truth,

That I may become

Wise in Your ways,

And let You renew my strength to a youth’s.

*

I pray, O my God,

That should I fall,

You’d prompt me to quickly repent.

And I pray that You’ll help me

Turn others to You,

So it’s not straight to Hell that they’re sent.

Living Among The 8 F’s

On TEAM LIFE, we are taught about the 8 F’s.  These are

• Faith
• Family
• Finances                                       
  
• Fitness
• Freedom
• Friendship
• Following
• Fun

Sunday, my husband Bob and I spent some time among 4 of the 8 F’s, Faith, Family, Friends and Fun.  That day started, as our Sundays always do, in the Faith F, with personal quiet devotional times, followed by preparing for and attending the 11:00 am service at our church. It was our turn, along with our son David, to read the appointed Scripture lessons for the day.  In addition, it was Bob’s turn to serve Communion, and David’s to usher.  We love attending a church where we can be fed from God’s Word and serve, too.

After church, we got together with my mother and one of my sisters, Suzanne, who was visiting from her home in The Netherlands.  Mom and Suzanne had also been at church, but had not sat with us.  Mom announced she wanted to go to lunch before going back to her assisted living facility.  We knew this would be our only opportunity to visit with Suzanne for any length, so Bob, David and I jumped at the opportunity to spend some time with the Family F.   .

We had a nice lunch with Suzanne and Mom, though Suzanne complained about the slow service.  Bob and I were able to share with them about TEAM LIFE and how much we get from the materials we get from our subscriptions and system tools.  Suzanne told us of her work and family.  It was a nice time to catch up.

After lunch, Suzanne had to go to another commitment,.  So Bob and I dropped David off for his shift at work, and brought my mother home.  By the time we got her settled back into her room and got back home, it was 4:30, over 3 1/2 hours after we got out of church.

When we arrived home, Bob and I started working on projects we needed to do before attending the TEAM LIFE major conference soon.  Then, noticing the time, we came to a stopping place in our chores and made a light dinner.  After dinner, Bob decided we should go back to church, where some Friends, who are professional musicians, were performing in a benefit concert for the school our church supports.

It was a lovely concert.  The school’s cafeteria was set up cabaret-style, with cloths and candles on the tables, and school children acting as waiters and waitresses.  They were offering coffee, tea and home-baked goodies for a nominal fee.  The music was wonderful,highlighting women composers and lyricists, primarily from the Great American Songbook.  Bob and I had a great deal of Fun.  Afterward, we came home to our regular Sunday evening conference call with our part of TEAM LIFE.

So Sunday was for us a great day, filled with 4 of the 8 F’s, Faith, Family, Friends and Fun.  We got to enjoy life in 4 of them in one day.  It is not often we get to have days like that, and we treasure them.

How do you do?  How is your life among TEAM LIFE‘s 8 F’s?  I hope, like ours, it is rewarding, interesting and full of joy.

Parenting Versus Grandparenting — A Nana’s Perspective

This is me, with our granddaughter Ariel.

We have had our oldest grandchild, Keyna, with us this weekend.  Keyna is 3, old enough to begin to know right from wrong, and be able to communicate her wishes and million questions.  Keyna has a little sister Ariel, age 13 months, who also spent some time with us yesterday. while Mommy (our daughter Beth) and Daddy (our son-in-law Tom) went out to lunch together. Keyna and Ariel are expecting a baby brother, Tommy, sometime in late May.

As we have been with Keyna and Ariel and interacted with them over the last few years, we have noticed some definite differences between being someone’s parent and being their grandparent.  And frankly, as the old saying goes, if we had known being grandparents was so much, we would have gone straight to it, and skipped the parent thing!

Parenting is diapers, duty, daily grind, consistent discipline and sometimes drudgery.  The day-to-day, especially with 2 (soon 3!)  children under 4 can be tough.   And there is

Our daughter Beth & husband Tom

always the knowledge you are putting in foundations for their whole lives.  There are, of course, moments of pure  joy, like when a toddler overcomes her  fears of something long enough to find she likes it, as Keyna did last summer with the slides at the park  Or moments when the kids are quiet, playing together cooperatively and not fighting.  Or when you find a child, cuddled up to her bear, looking at a book you have read and reread to her, and she is looking at the oh-so-familiar pictures and “reading” it to the stuffed animal.  It’s moments like these that  make parenting the best job on earth.

On the other hand, grand parenting is usually a ball!  Of course, when they are in your care, you have to exercise discipline and control, and sometimes rules at your house might be different than at home.  There also will be home rules you reinforce, just to keep consistency.  But the rest of the time is pure fun time!

We took Keyna grocery shopping with us on both Saturday and Sunday.  She got to eat at any sample booth she wanted, even the one with cheesecake.  We had to go both days, because we bought strawberries on Saturday, but did not get enough to feed her appetite for them, her favorite food (mine, too) and our favorite bribery tool!  That tiny 1 pound of berries was just not enough, so we had to get more the next day.  I bought some raisins and mixed nuts to make a snack mix for me, and of course as I mixed it, Keyna had to

This is me, with our granddaughter, Keyna.

sample every color of raisin (there were 3) and every kind of nut . . .

Grandparents bend the rules.  At church, instead of taking her to the nursery, we asked if she could be good in the service if her favorite bear came.  She said she could, and while she didn’t sit like a miniature adult (and we had realistically not expected it of her), Keyna was quiet and well-behaved  through the entire 2 hour service.

Kids get lots from grandparents they don’t get from their parents.  Like bears, as in the one I wrote about before.  (Check my archives.)  Grandparents often have time and energy to do things parents can’t.  Take today, for instance.  Keyna walked in on me when I was using the bathroom.  (We have to work more on privacy!)  She noticed my belly button, and asked me what it was.  I told her.  She asked if she had one, and I said yes.  The questions of everyone in her life having one followed, and I was able to say yes, everyone does, even the cats on her list, somewhere under their fur.  She left, and I finished, going to my bedroom to do some chores there.

A few minutes later, Keyna walked in,carrying her bears that had come with her for the weekend.  “Do my bears have belly buttons?” she asked.  No, they were not born, they were made.  Keyna was so sad, I asked if she wanted me to give her bears belly buttons.  She said yes, so instead of doing my chores, I spent the next 45 minutes embroidering belly buttons on 2 stuffed bears. Because that is what grandparents do.  Grandparents get to do the fun stuff.

Historical Leaders and Rascals 2 — A Family Rascal

My mother’s family is full of Rascals. The earliest one we know of is her great-grandfather, an Irish sea-captain. His daughter, my mother’s grandmother, was a famous painter of her day, in a time when women were expected to keep house and care for their families, and not carry out anything beyond that. But it was her grandson, my mother’s own father, who stands out head and shoulders above the crowd in his Rascalinity among them. His Rascalinity is so legendary, Hollywood even made a movie about it!

He was born in New England, to an Irish-descended family that had emigrated sometime before from Canada. He had hazel green eyes, rose-gold hair and fair skin, and my mother’s family says I am the only one of my siblings to carry resemblance to him in my eyes and my coloring.

He was intelligent, and clever. He did well in school, and was well-known in the area for his pranks both in and out of it. Nothing he did ever had evil purpose, so far as anyone could tell. He just showed a strong contrary streak and mischievousness early and often.

However, somehow he managed to graduate high school, at or nearly at the top of his class. Entry into VMI, the Virginia Military Institute, a prestigious college, followed. It was

there his high spirits, Rascalinity and mischievous pranks reached their full flower and legendary greatness.

My grandfather managed to graduate VMI with what stands even today as the highest combination of grade point average and demerits for behavior possible.He was constantly running afoul of the established hierarchy there, whether through deliberate pranks or

unthinking transgressions of the strict disciplinary code.

The movie they made of him was due to his career at VMI. It was made in 1938, and his name was changed in it to protect his reputation, as he matured from there to become an entrepreneur in Upstate New York. It starred Wayne Morris, Eddie Albert, Ronald Reagan and Jane Wyman (it was the movie that introduced them to each other). Eddie Albert played “‘Bing Edwards,’” the character on whom my grandfather was based; the title character of “Brother Rat“, and the child who was to be secretly soon to be born was my mother. It was so popular, Hollywood also made a sequel, that was not at all based on his life, “Brother Rat and Baby“. His real name was Augustus Lambe, and I am proud to call this famously legendary Rascal my grandfather.

A Cute Marketing Ploy

I like good advertising and marketing.  I appreciate it when a company goes to great

lengths to get our attention, and prompt us to buy their product or sign up for their service.

For example, Time Warner Cable was running a series of advertisements in our region about their new “Whole House DVR” system.  They show people moving from room to room in their homes, getting snacks, moving to another television, and some action movie they are watching follows them from room to room, pausing only when a room change is

made.

That’s clever.  It gets your attention and holds it.  It shows the features and benefits, without a lot of voice-over to explain what it is trying to say.  It is also one other thing truly good marketing and advertising must be — memorable.  Once you see it, you can’t forget  it.

The advertising that has caught my attention most recently, however, is even better.  It belongs to a local health club chain, and is a billboard I must pass on the interstate every morning on my way to work.

Billboards are a much tougher media to work with to grab and hold attention than commercials.    For one thing, there’s no action, animation or video to grab you and lure you in.  Yes, I know, some of them scroll from ad to ad, but that’s not really animation, if we are  honest with ourselves.  Furthermore, like most of its kind, it is stationary, while most of

the time we are flying past  (hopefully doing the speed limits!), concentrating on getting where we are going  on time.  So for a billboard to survive these challenges and be worthy of note has to make it memorable, indeed.

This billboard is about the New Year’s specials at this particular health club chain.  Their  offer didn’t catch my attention.  It can’t.  We already have memberships at a competitor.  What they said below it did.  They say,

WTF

My kids are 26, 30 and 35.  I also work with people younger than myself, so I know what those initials mean in popular culture.   But the story doesn’t end there,  Because below that it reads,

(Wow.  That’s Fantastic!)

I cannot help to admire such memorable cleverness . . .